Tuesday, June 28, 2011


This blog has been quiet lately, in part because my work on the Morrigan statue project slowed this spring while other responsibilities came to the fore. The other reason is that I've been struggling with what to say. I started this blog to share my process with the Morrigan statue, and along with that my observations, thoughts, philosophies arising from my work as Her priestess.

Since PantheaCon, I've been in a queer state of ambivalence. To those of you who were present for the huge Morrigan devotional ritual we held at the Con, it might sound strange to hear that what I came away with was ambivalence. But it's true.

The ritual work leading up to and in the ritual itself triggered something very big in my relationship with the Morrigan. I think most participants would agree that the ritual tapped into an enormous current of desire and something that I can only describe as urgency. There is a tide rising in our communities, a sense of readiness for a call that we all somehow know is coming, and that we yearn for. The ritual felt galvanizing, transformative. A massing of forces on the eve of some battle. People took oaths. Thresholds were crossed.

Afterwards, I came home continuing to think about where those thresholds are taking us now. What exactly DID we tap into? What now?

For what purpose are these forces massing?

I came home carrying the sword, the one upon which all those oaths had been sworn. It held a force and vibratory power in it that was clear to the senses of everyone who touched it, and impossible to ignore. For a few days, we had it on the altar in our bedroom (oops). My husband described it thus: "There is a sword, and I have a house around it." Shortly afterward, I took it up to the Morrigan's shrine site, planted it in the ground there with prayers to Her, and left it there for a night and a day to let the power of the oaths pour out of it and be earthed in Her shrine. While I was up there, I prayed and sat and listened and She, still overshadowing me in the aftermath of the big ritual, whispered to me. "Yes. You have brought me the sword. Soon, you will bring me warriors. The time is coming."

That message left me shaken, and hence my ambivalence. I continue to feel a great urgency from Her, a sense of pressure as if someone were literally leaning against me, or the way you feel when someone is staring hard at the back of your head. I realized then that the big ritual was not the culmination of a process, but the start of one, and I have an obligation to Her to see it through. But I still do not fully understand what "it" is. The hints and whispers I receive from Her continue to point toward mobilizing our people, our communities, in preparation for something. Mobilization, preparation, massing and honing of forces. That's what She keeps whispering. I remain ambivalent about this because whenever I talk about what it is I sense She wants from us, I begin to think I'm sounding delusional, militaristic, or at best naive. And because I can't yet figure out how it is that I, without even any genuine fighting skills to my credit, am going to bring warriors to the Morrigan. Not alone, that's for sure.

This has been my state for the past few months. Waiting, listening, looking for further insight. Talking to friends and companions. In the meantime, the signs keep coming. I've had messages from both friends and strangers that She has been speaking to others, appearing in their dreams, sending warnings, delivering the call to action. Meanwhile, I continue to watch the distress signals flickering on in the world around us.

Yesterday I spent a little time working on the statue, preparing Her for the next stage of the sculptural process. While I worked, I asked Her again for guidance, and I listened. The word RESISTANCE sounded in my head.

Today, this article caught my eye. And this one. Those are just examples - I've seen many of these signs, too many to enumerate. They remind me of that word, resistance.

Am I saying that I want to form a militia? I don't think so. I think the forces of authoritarian control would have us hopelessly outgunned, and I think as soon as we limit our thinking about resistance to the level of guns, we have already lost. But I think we need something. We need resilient networks of community that are decentralized, that provide real, manifest support for their members - not just mental support, but survival skills and material necessities that will allow us the real-life autonomy from which to resist. We need these networks to be in place and vibrant before they become a survival necessity. And yes, I do think fighting skills are among those survival skills we need to cultivate. A person who has the ability to protect themselves and their loved ones, and the means and resources to live autonomously if needed, is a person who cannot as easily be cowed or seduced into toeing the line - or buying the line. It takes a warrior to resist, even if that resistance is not in the form of conventional armed resistance.

I still don't really know where to begin, and I suppose that is why I'm writing this. Nervously, at that. I want to hear from you. Have you heard the Morrigan's call? What are your Gods urging you toward? What do you sense we are being called upon to do?

In the meantime, my co-priestesses from the Morrigan ritual, T. Thorn Coyle, Sharon Knight, and I are planning to hold a weekend workshop intensive focused on this work, in November of this year. It's a place to start. I'll have details to post soon, I hope.


  1. Rethink your definition of Militia. The militia does not exist solely for the purposes of putting down the overreach of the federal government, it exists to prevent that overreach from occurring in the first place. And that is the last of its responsibilities.

    Militias mainly assist people locally in the case of disaster, as the Michigan militia deployed during hurricane Katrina for the purposes of distributing relief supplies in an orderly fashion.

    Militias were originally meant to be a peoples alternative to an imperial army. That's why there is no mention of a standing army in the constitution. Local, voluntary, orderly; their purpose was to keep order and foreign armies out.
    If every state had one, the standing federal army would barely need to exist. And subsequently could not be used to invade undeserving countries in "our national interest" (read; resource looting).

    A militia then is local empowerment in the interest of real homeland security. A militia might serve many, many purposes; food aid (even of the food not bombs variety), fire suppression, neighborhood watch programs. And yes, defense from tyranny. Would the cops be so eager to beat up protesters at the Jefferson memorial if armed militia members were there as the constitution allows?
    Militia members have successfully prevented local municipalities from declaring immanent domain for the purpose of giving land to private corporations.

    There are a lot of things to resist, and a lot of ways to resist that don't necessarily involve a slugfest with the US military.

    In fact, in terms of tyranny and oppression the US military is the least of our worries.

  2. I found the Morrigan ritual incredibly powerful, and the seismic shifts I felt internally in response to the oath I gave are still going on.

    It takes a warrior to resist, even if that resistance is not in the form of conventional armed resistance.

    Yes yes yes! When people talk about being uncomfortable with the word "warrior" I often point out that it doesn't just mean some huge person with a big weapon about to take someone's head off.

    It takes a warrior to resist the urge to give up in the face of overwhelming injustice. It takes a warrior to resist her/his inclination to sleep in rather than getting up and doing daily spiritual work. It takes a warrior to resist the temptation to live an easy, inauthentic life and strive for the viscerally terrifying prospect of claiming his/her power.

  3. There are many ways to resist. Some are about getting smaller and more secretive, while others are about getting louder and more aggressive. I tend to use both.

    In a similar vein, many people I know are starting to learn and value the skills of our ancestors towards self-sufficiency and understand that we need to stick together now.

  4. Nice to read this. On a practical warriorship note, I know that it was empowering for me to do a Wilderness First Responder training, some skills that support surviving in the event of rapid systemic unraveling.

    In terms of my own calling, I am drawn, at least in part, to seed multi-generational work with the spirits of place here in the Bay Area as a way to magically slow down fear-based time and to reawaken the old powers whose bodies are nature here. There are already proto-structures in place for these workings as we've talked about.

    The other thing that comes to mind is training folks in how to work with the unseen challenges and poisons (e.g., troubled ghosts, nasty/demonic type energies, other subtle poisons).

    Although I'm not personally acquainted with the Morrigan, if it feels useful I'm happy to listen, reflect, dialogue about any of what you're sorting through, you have my support, blessings on everything you're up to there.


  5. I missed your devotional. Sorry I did, though what I'll politely label "cultural disparity" makes my participation difficult.

    Regardless, I will risk public mockery by admitting that - yes, I agree with your assessment of Her call, because I've heard it all my freakin' life.

    And Ive said it all my life, since I was a child. A storm is coming. Many ideals and even ideologies have passed through my life, even across a wide enough spectrum that individually they could not have co-existed.

    But this ideal has always been with me, and never ever faded. I almost want to say, "Welcome to the Resistance, glad to have you!" B-)

    That being said, resistance is just a goal and militancy is a mindset. Whether it manifest in the forming of militia-style regional defense forces, or just getting food and energy production off the grid, is a matter of mere strategic and cultural consideration.

    But yes, resistance is calling. Some of us are already preparing. Have been preparing. And we need to do more. At the risk of being accused of self-glorification, I think this one's gonna be ugly. I've always thought that. The Elemental machine appears to be winding down. The pre-Christian scryers saw 4 horsemen - I suspect it's the 4 Elemental Archangels pulling their respective plugs on us. And I don't blame them - look what "we" as a human race have done. Not only have we debased and debauched the body of the Earth, we've done the same to the Earth-style consciousness which we've received from her.

    Anyway, Morpheus thank you for the additional revelation - Messenger of the Goddess. P-)

  6. Hmm. I was not at Pcon or you know I'd have been at that ritual. I had to settle for second-hand accounts from others who were in attendance (which I heard while I was in, ahem, Ireland).

    There are reasons within reasons, and resistances many-fold. I would not be surprised, though I have not had direct conversation with her much about all of this, if this push were behind my signing up for a year-long herb intensive among other things. I am gathering all sorts of practical skills.

    Crow in Tejas

  7. Thanks everyone for all the responses so far. I hope to continue this conversation with many of you, here or elsewhere.

    @3N's - yes, I think the thing I'm reaching for is that we need to be formidable, but organized toward peaceful strength.

    @Van - I think you would have found this PCon's ritual more to your taste than the Samhain devotional you joined us at before. It felt very much like what I think you were looking for at that earlier ritual. Heartening, to be sure. And thank you for the comment "messenger of the Goddess" - kind of you to say; and of course She has many messengers. I am seeking to connect with as many others as possible.

    @morrigandaughtr - I did think of you while we were getting ready for it. Many were there in spirit.

    And yes, yes yes, to all these ideas: to reviving the skills of our ancestors, to sticking together, to all of these things. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  8. Interesting.

    Sorry, I have nothing more to add at this point but I wanted to acknowledge none the less, I guess.

  9. I have felt the call for awhile. It's kinda scary when things get so bad that people who laughed at the conspiracy theorists are now one of them. I have begun to prepare, as have my small group who will be with me when it really hits the fan.

  10. I hope my first comment didn't seem flip. The thing is that your post came at a time that was really relevant to things I've finally started writing about, that I've sort of written "around" for awhile. When She came into my life, it changed me, but I've seen few who seem to have felt the same thing exactly. I mean that not as "no one" but as in a few folk that I have found. Finding someone else who is thinking along these lines, but seemingly coming from a different direction, was striking at that moment. It's given me a lot to think about.

    I'm working on a blog I hope to have up today or soon, about the warrior path and An MorrĂ­gan. It's a bit rambly, as I think this comment is. I'll be linking to this post as well.

    I've often been accused of wanting to start a militia and such. But it's not that. No rising up, as much as preparing for when the crazy hits.

    I'm also very inspired by your project, here, the statue. I am lacking that sort of talent however. But you have me thinking on that too and what I might be able to do. You know, maybe looking over our range or something.

  11. Saigh, I didn't take it as flip. I am glad to connect with any others who hear Her call and want to have something to offer. I appreciate hearing from like-minded folks and hope we can keep in touch.

  12. You know, I was having a similar conversation a few weeks ago. I have noticed recently that the Morrigan has been calling quite a few people lately and I had to wonder why. When she comes calling in numbers like these I wouldn't call it a "good" thing. We can only assume the purpose, but a warrior Goddess (amongst other things) calls up in the numbers I have noticed lately to follow her only brings one thing to mind (for me at least).


  13. I am finding your posts to be of great comfort and information. I have just found them and will be reading them all as well as the links over the next few days. I sense a great truth and many applications to made from what you have been and are being given as well as in what you are giving.